TLC will premiere a brand-new episode of The Fetish Couple on Sunday. The reality series centers around Monica, a straight woman, and Aaron, her kink-loving boyfriend; its purpose is to assist in exploring their sexual interests together while exploring fantasies together.
No doubt it can be scary to come out as possessive with your partner about your fetishes, yet according to a 2018 survey conducted by EdenFantasys sex toy company it found 51% of people take at least a month before making their intentions known if you want your relationship to last. But sooner is better in terms of relationship longevity.
Psychotherapist and sex therapist Nazanin Moali suggests to make it easier for your partner to comprehend, it is best to introduce your fetishes and kinks in an outside conversation, like over coffee or an evening stroll. “Use humor if possible: for instance saying: ‘Feet are really turning me on’ followed by telling them you would like licking their toes during sex or grinding against their genital area with your foot.”
Once they know of your interests, they may or may not want to explore those kinks with you; or it might even turn them off altogether – the key here is raising it in an appropriate and friendly manner so they aren’t made feel embarrassed for not sharing in them.
Note that fetishes differ from preferences in that you might desire redheads but not be sexually attracted to them, according to sexologist Carol Queen. A fetish tends to be about a need rather than anything sexual; on the other hand, kinks involve sexual attraction between partners.